tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-75768770795807227342024-03-13T14:50:58.598-07:00Confessions of a SuperstarEmail Me- superstarsblog@yahoo.com love to hear from everyone! Anytime.Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.comBlogger98125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-38802534170394893782010-08-05T22:35:00.001-07:002010-08-05T23:01:31.865-07:00so a post....finallyhey guys i know i havent been very up to date with my posts and i also do realize i say that in almost every post lol. and as much as i love to blog and have so much stuff going on i just dont have time unfortunetly to blog everything. so if i was to write everything thats been going on this post would be a million pages long so ill condense it for you so it wont be so boring for you guys to read haha<br /><br />so Lets talk about N ugh that boy. he drives me crazy one minute he acts like he wants to be with me than the next minute he acts like he doesnt want anything to do with me so i dont know whats going through his mind. because in my last post i was freaking out because one of his friends was going to be my date for my birthday party but it turns out i told him not to even come so i could be with N and it ended up being an amazing night with him and i really was glad that happened. but then it seemed to just be a rollercoaster ride after that. cause he had a date with some guy that ended up not working out i guess cause he doesnt talk to him anymore which is a plus for me but a while after that one of our mutual friends who we will call K comes into the picture. one night i guess N invited her over to go drinking with him...i guess he didnt want me to go lol. and i guess he was all over her trying to hook up with her the whole night...which is something i do not understand whats so ever because hes gay....lol but whatever so i was really mad at him and didnt talk to him for a while actually went like a week without seeing or talking to him which is a record for me lol. but then of course i started getting lonely again and missing him so i talked to him and hung out with him and it was not the same. i guess cause i was still mad at him and just that was the last straw so whatever than i realized i was done with him and just didnt want to see him anymore. but then he would always come up everywhere! i mean we have the same friends, we know the same people, it would be really hard to just drop him. so i started thinking i have to accept the fact hes gonna be in my life no matter what and i jut have to seperate those feelings from what i should be feeling for him which is him being only my friend. and then that works really good for a long time about a few weeks and i moved on started talking to someone else and just forgetting about him in that sense. and then bam! guess who comes back and tries to swoop me back up again...<br /><br />Just the other day he came over to my house with K because as she puts it she is trying to fix the way us three were before all that shit went down. and i was lie whatever i really didnt care at this point. but then having him here having him be close to me just brought back unwanted feelings and i wanted to be strong and shoo them away but they didnt go away. and he was holding me on the couch and he starts nibbling and licking my ear which feels amazing!!! and he knows thats my weakness and i love that so much so he starts doing that than we make out a lot and its really nice and i feel safe and it just feels right having him hold onto me keeping me warm. i just felt like i was where i needed to be which is completly stupid but its true. so now hes coming over tomorrow and it will be me and him and we are having a movie night which will be really nice and i just get to be with him which is what i really want. i wish i could make things work with him but i know deep down it wont. we havent even had sex yet and im still really attachted to him which i dont know if thats a good thing or a bad thing but i guess we will see. <br /><br />but anyways i think thats all ill type for right now. and i will make it a point to post some more maybe tomorrow but probably not because N will be here so maybe the next night but i have a reminder set so i dont forget!! but would love to hear from all you guys and everything i will now go read your blogs and catch up!Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-72944804932629107932010-06-21T02:54:00.001-07:002010-06-21T03:06:11.205-07:00KINDA FREAKING OUT!!!ok so tonight i think i made a horrible mistake....ok so if you read my last post you read all about N and how much i really really like him. well....thats true. but for some reason today i was talking to this guy i met at pride and he asked me to be his date for his bday party coming up. well i also am having a birthday party coming up and am dateless but wanted N to be my date. but me and this guy im talking to lets call him M kinda hit it off and he asks me to be his date for his birthday party....so like a stupid retard i agree... then the conversation came about to my party and how i dont have a date and then by the end of the conversation he ends up being my date for my birthday. fuuuuckkk so now i dont know what to do!! M is gorgeous though like extremely gorgeous. N is hot too dont get me wrong. and the thing about me is when someone shows a little interest i get all into it and get a little carried away...obviously.....ok so with N i really really like him. alot completley fallen for him. and of course hes coming to my birthday. and hes even bought me a present already. and now im torn....i am a horrible person!! i got carried away with M and now i could have potentially screwed things up with N. <br /><br />i know what i need to do is talk to N and see what he feels about me so i know for sure so im not being led on and if he is leading me on then i can move onto M but in the meantime i dont know what to do...<br /><br />oh and it gets better guess how i met M through N!!!! hes one of N's friends and he kinda barely introduced me to him at the festival this weekend. and so M added me on facebook and weve been kinda messaging each other and IMing and what not and then tonight happened and i dont know what to do about the whole situation.....<br /><br />so what do you guys think? i know i need to find out what N thinks and i might find out tomorrow but other than that would should i do. i cant believe i even put myself in this situation....but i did and i need to get out of it because i dont want to do this to N if he does really like me. because i feel this is exactly what happened between me and C he started seeing someone else while i was seeing him and it hurt me really bad. and i dont want to do that to anyone else. especailly someone i really like like N...,.....<br /><br /><br />uuuugggghhhh any advice?Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-11105929439654778242010-06-20T01:46:00.000-07:002010-06-20T02:43:08.297-07:00long over due update lolok so last post was about the pride festival being the next day. well yes the pride festival happened and it was awesome!!! had so much fun got a bunch of free stuff and lots of condoms they were giving them out like crazy lol. which is good. but the main reason i had so much fun was because i saw N it was awesome i really like him so much, so he was volunteering there and so throughout the day i would take him water or just see him and say hi and it was nice. then he left from volunteering early to come hang out with me and a friend i was with. and that was super fun. everyone thought we were dating lol and it was so funny lol after a while he stopped correcting people lol. i didnt care i was like heck ya lets just say were dating lol. anyways after the festival was over he asked if i wanted to have a sleepover. of course i did!!!! lol i wasnt sure if i was going to sleep with him that night but i was freaking out in my head thinking of all the stuff i would need to do before having sex you know the basics. shower, shave things like that. but luckily we didnt hook up. and yes i do say good thing.<br /><br />see the thing is as much as i need to have sex right now. with N i dont want to sleep with him yet. i want to take what we have or what we could possibly have slow. i dont want to rush into things like with C. that was horrible. but with N everyone is telling me be careful with him and its making me worried. im already scared and worried about the whole thing. <br /><br />but anyways i spent the night at his house and all we did was make out and we made out a lot and i really liked that. he is an amazing kisser. and then we cuddled it was awesome. then the next day we just spent the day at his house and then it was getting kinda later and he didnt want me to leave but he didnt want to be at his house so we went to my house and he spent the night again. we didnt sleep at all!! it was horrible lol we didnt have sex we just stayed up. that was nice too then we spent monday together and it was just amazing<br /><br />then the week went by and i was missing him a lot. then yesterday we were going to go shopping and then to dinner with some work friends of mine and then back to my house for another sleepover =) we slept more than we did last time. he downloading some things on his computer just for me. hes so sweet. and im pretty sure my mom saw us kissing lol oh well i dont care but it was still funny lol. my mom was hanging out with us kinda all night we got smashed and it was just a whole lot of fun. i was all over him though. in front of my mom. i didnt care lol i was hugging him and putting my head on his shoulder and then we cuddled on the bed it was awesome. i really like him so much ive been spending so much time with him and hes just amazing. but one of my friends whos known him for a long time told me to be careful with him because hes not the boyfriend type. he keeps a boyfriend for about a week and then its over. im just thinking, i love how shes looking out for me but i dont want to hear that i dont want my bubble to be burst because i do like him so much. <br /><br />it was so cute today because for his birthday i told him i was going to give him 20 bucks for his birthday and i never did so he asked about it. he wanted his 20 dollar birthday present so he could buy my present and get me a card....isnt that cute!! omg i like him so much...its gross how much i like him. i talk about him all the time. hes always on my mind. and i just want to talk to him forever and never stop! <br /><br />but im scared....really scared. i dont want to get hurt by him. i dont want to sleep with him and him decide thats all he wanted and move on. i really really dont want that at all. i want to sleep with him and actually be with him. with C he slept with me a few times and that was it. and that would have been cool if he didnt tell me how much he liked me and how he wanted a relationship with me and then go see someone else. sorry still a tad bit bitter about that situation lol. <br /><br />also ive been gooing through this depression mode lately where it has just been really bad...then i start talking to N a lot more and i am doing a lot better. im not drinking so much because im not so lonely. so im hoping this works out for the best. <br /><br />hes so cute too!! omg!! and the thing i really like is he hasnt tried to sleep with me. which could mean two things. 1. he wants to take it slow and doesnt want to ruin it like i do. or 2. he thinks of me as just a friend who he makes out with occasionally. but soo many people have told me that he wouldnt make out or hang out with me as much as he does if he didnt like me more than a friend. <br /><br />hes so hard to read i dont know what hes thinking half the time. and he talks about the most random stuff just to cover up what hes really thinking. but i dont know what hes thinking. its so hard to read him. <br /><br />but one day we were at his house after the pride festival and he was sitting on top of me facing me and we were making out and he looks at me and he goes "sorry if you can feel my boner on your chest kissing really turns me on" i dont think i felt it but i had a boner too and i said it really turns me on too and we kept kissing but no sex....which again is good!! i dont want to sleep with him yet. <br /><br />another thing that sucks is i cant talk to K about it because shes just so bias and doesnt believe hes not the type of person she thinks he is. and shes my best friend and i cant tell her anything about him without her giving me bad advice. <br /><br />but anyways i better stop typing. i get into a groove and i cant stop lol i love to type. and i know this is already long and your probably tired of reading. ill continue soon.<br /><br /><br />xoxo<br />superstarSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-62258928969073368472010-06-12T02:41:00.000-07:002010-06-12T02:50:00.907-07:00tomorrow!!soooo my pride festival is tomorrow and im sooo excited for it!! lol ive never been to a gay pride festival before so im like really excited lol and i get to see N tomorrow too and im soo excited to see him. <br /><br />he called me the other day....i missed his call cause i was asleep =( but i texted him when i woke up and told him to call me later. but we were texting like all day!!! totally made my day! and then today i was texting him and guess what! he calls me!!! he wants to hang out with me before he has to be where he needs to be for the festival because hes voluntering and then he wants to maybe hang out after too!!! lol <br /><br />im like a little girl i get so excited when he talks to me lol which is stupid but idk i like him. i told K i was going to see him tomorrow and shes like ugh why do you like him. but i honestly cant come up with anything. thats bad huh? hes cute and an amazing kisser!! like an amazing kisser omg noone has ever kissed me like he did. not even C and i liked C a whooooole lot more!!! but damn! that boy knows how to kiss the sparks were like amazing!!!!! lol i cant even explain it lol <br /><br />but that cant be the only reason i like him there has to be something else...there just has to be...ill figure it out lol. i just know i really like him a lot. hes all i think about when i think about guys. i dont want to do anything with anyone else because they arent him. except for another guy J i think i might have talked about him. i almost hooked up with him on cinco de mayo and i really like him to....but theres something about N i cant get over lol. and the fact hes actually been talking to me consistently for the past few days is amazing!! lol aaaand he said hes coming to my big party im throwing in a few weeks!!! i just want him here! lol<br /><br />well ill let you guys know how tomorrow goes. who knows i just might find another cute boy to go after lol it is gay pride after all lol. there will be lots of cute boys there lolSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-65827794985364593622010-06-10T19:47:00.000-07:002010-06-10T20:04:03.027-07:00hey guyssoo guys guess what internet is now on my computer!!! holla!!!! so now hopefully i can even post a lot more posts lol. which is good. and then i can get my blog out there a lot more too which would be really good. <br /><br />so lets see whats been going on this past few days or so lol....<br /><br />so i told you K bf is in town for the whole summer and its super annoying because hes like a little puppy dog and cant keep his hands off her. its suuuuuper annoying!!!! but whatevs shes happy and thats all that matters. my depression mode is kinda going away slowly but i know once i come out of it something is going to happen to bring it right back. but hopefully not. lol <br /><br />i woke up this morning happy. i had a missed all from someone i wanted to talk to, N, too bad i was asleep lol but i texted him when i woke up so we could talk and he actually texted me back and weve been texting on and off all day its nice. and i get to see him for sure on saturday so im super excited for that. <br /><br /><br />this saturday is gay pride in my town and im suuuper stoked for it. ive never been to a pride festival so im super excited to actually go to one. and plus n will be there so thats why i want to go so bad lol <br /><br />lets see what else is going on.....i have no idea....lol well ill think of something and fill you guys in <br /><br />xoxo<br />superstarSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-59013271696018620102010-05-31T21:02:00.000-07:002010-05-31T21:13:25.824-07:00update...Hey guys, I know I haven't blogged in a while but I've just been so busy. Work is taking up all my time by the time I get home all I wanna do is sleep. Haven't been able to get my computer yet but hopefully soon. So I'm still doing everything on my phone, which slows me down...a lot lol. <br /><br />So let's see where I left off. Me and C are over turns out he strung me along and when he decided I wasn't good enough he went to someone else. The thing is...if he would have just told me he wanted to have sex and then move on...I would have been ok with that. But no he kept telling me how much he liked me and he could see us working out long term. Which got my hopes up because I really liked him and then I found out he started seeing someone else. Super depressing but oh well. I'm kinda pretty much over it now. Took 2 months but whatevs lol. <br /><br />And then there's N. It was his birthday a few weeks ago and I decided to go over there you know hang out. It was his birthday I wanted to be a good friend. K flipped out on me saying how I blew her off and how I chose him over her and blah blah. It actually turned out to be a good night. It was just me, N, and another friend (my ride) and me and N ended up cuddling of course lol. Then my friend decides she wants to leave. She was my ride so I had to go with her. Which sucked cause I was not ready to leave yet. So while were waiting for her to get ready he pulls me aside and just starts making out with me and it was soooo nice. I really really didn't want to leave him. See the thing is I've had a thing for N forever! Like seriously the longest time. And I still do. So we were leaving and he walked us outside I gave him a hug and my friend him a hug and he was giving me this weird look...so I gave him a hug and then kissed him goodbye it was cute. So that was a good night and then I went over to another friends house to party. And plus another boy I like is there lol. So I hung out with him all night but I wasn't all over him like I usually am. I was texting N the whole night lol. But me and this other guy H almost hooked up once....<br /><br />Cinco de mayo, me and H were really getting close that night we ended up sleeping in the same bed. He was naked lol (cause apparently he doesn't sleep with clothes on which is funny cause I've seen him sleep with clothes on before lol) so we were laying there talking and I was playing with his hair and we were getting really close we already made out by this time. We were making out like the whole night. So we started getting into it started touching each other it was hot lol and then....he passed out lol right in the middle of it. He was so drunk though I'm surprised he was awake for that long lol. <br /><br />So anyways that's another boy I like right now. But the thing is H likes girls too. And my friend from work is his best friend and they've hooked up.....he pretty much lives there. So it would be hard for me to have a relationship with H knowing that. Id be so scared that he would do something bad. Lol and plus he drinks like a fish. Seriously but he's gorgeous! And he's super nice and funny. So maybe just hookup buddies would work lol. But knowing me I would get attached and end up being hurt at the end lol. That's just how I am. <br /><br />I'm the type of person that gets attatched very easily. I fall for someone almost immediatly. I mean look at me and N all we've done is made out and cuddling and would do anything to be with him. I guess maybe its because I'm so new at all this dating, and boys, and sex. I don't know how to handle it all quite yet. But I think ill get there. <br /><br />I just know I really want someone special. Someone who wants to hang out with me all the time. Someone who texts me and I get so happy I can't control my facial expression. I want that so bad. Someone who surprises me by doing something amazing out of the blue. I'm totally ready for that one person to come into my life and make it a whole lot better. I wanna know what its like to really like someone and have them like you back. That amazing feeling you get when you can't stop talking about them, or looking at a picturee of them, or your mind is constantly on that person. I'm completely ready to have that. <br /><br />Well I guess I've vented enough for today. Hopefully ill step it up and be able to blog more often. I really do enjoy it. It let's me get a lot of things off my chest. =) <br /><br />Xoxo<br /> -SuperstarSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-72812869696387903862010-04-21T01:08:00.000-07:002010-04-21T01:09:26.276-07:00...sigh....Thank you guys for your advice. And it might not be what I wanted to hear but its definitely something I guess I needed to hear. Its just really hard because I do like him sooo much! And he tells me he likes me too but idk.....I was suppossed to see him tonight but his party didn't go down and I texted him and he didn't text me back so idk....<br /><br />The first night it was only about sex. But he started saying how much he's liked me for so long and all this stuff and I felt a really good connection with him and it just made me fall for him. And I tend to get attached easily. So it couldn't be just about sex. And he never talks about anything in the bedroom. I guess its not to easy for him to talk about idk....<br /><br />I need to find someone who I can talk to and be with all the time. And I'm the type of person who would love to spoil someone. Take them out, buy them things and just be with them. Like after all that happened with N all I wanted to do is be with C just to be with him. Not sex necissarily just to be with him and hang out. <br /><br />So about N. He's definitely someone I need to distance myself from. Because I know if I was in the same situation as I was this weekend the same thing would happen to me because I can't control myself because in a weird way I do like him. And I can be hurt and mad at him for what he did but its so hard for me to get over someone and I know that I would let him do that to me again. <br /><br />That night I spent with him just cuddling and holding each other got to me waaay to much! I enjoyed it soo much and I just felt like I was so loved and I didn't feel so lonely. And then the next day I just felt like I got punched and soooo lonely! I realized I don't have anybody special to just hold on to when I need them. <br /><br />I was hoping C could become that person but I have doubts on that unfortunetly which is soo hard for me to say because I'm not a negative person I'm always the one to think positive. But I just have felt really down in the dumps the past few days. I couldn't even focus on work today because I was in a different state of mind. <br /><br />But I know a few people who have people they want to set me up with haha. And I know from now on I need to keep my guard up and not be so open to falling for someone. <br /><br />And its so hard for me to because I like sex. And if a cute guy is hitting on me I'm gonna let it happen and then maybe fall for them and then get hurt but idk....I'm gonna start trying really hard. <br /><br />But thank you all for the advice. And if you haven't read my posts from yesterday please read and let me know what you think please :-) <br /><br />Xoxo!Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-77665675129842176572010-04-20T04:53:00.000-07:002010-04-20T05:04:58.324-07:00venting timeok so a while ago i met this guy N who i liked right off the bat. he was cute, funny, fun and i just all around liked him. he gave me his number and we were kinda texting and i would text him pretty much everyday and we would talk a little bit you know and then one night i got a little drunk and told him i wanted to have sex with him. and i felt like it got kinda awkward and we didnt text as much and now we barely text ever! and so this weekend....i came over to my friend A's house for a party and he was here and we were all hanging out ad then me and N started making out and then we were just making out the whole night lol. it was nice because i liked him a lot before. so i thought i was gonna get some but it didnt work out that way but thats ok!! we ended up cuddling on the couch and falling asleep here and there watching a movie and everytime he would wake up he would kiss me a little and make out with me it was a really nice night. <br /><br />so then the next day which was technically yesterday (monday) we were hanging out in the morning and i had to go to work and so he asked me to stay with him and miss work...soo the stupid person that i am...called in sick...well we were having a pretty good day and then we heard from one of his old "best friends" he hasnt seen in a year or so....whos suppossedly straight and has a girlfriend who i met! <br /><br />so once his friend got there he kinda started ignoring me a little bit. and i was like ok him and his friend are catching up you know no big. so then we were watching a movie and he was all over this guy....like he was on me the night before. and i was like...ok....and i was a little confused and so he just ignored me the rest of the night and then they went to bed together....i dont know for sure if they did anthing but the way they were acting it was obvious something was gonna happen...it just makes me really mad....and i was really upset earlier because it was just so rude i think....and i dont know exactly why i care so much but....i do. so at the moment im hating him....<br /><br />oh ya and my friend K was here partying with us on sunday night when we were making out and she told me he told her he was just teasing me so i can want him and he wouldnt do anything with me......she doesnt like him in the first place so idk if he really said that but im pretty sure he did. but i just dont know what to do...<br /><br />but anyways just thought id vent that out a little bit lol. <br /><br />dont forget to read my post below this one to give me some advice please it would be very much appreciated!! <br /><br /><br /><br />and p.s. ill try and keep you guys updating within the next few days on these situations im gonna try and get at least a little bit of sleep now.....thank you guys!!!!Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-44740875137694691862010-04-20T04:41:00.000-07:002010-04-20T04:53:32.568-07:00uugghh stupid boysok so i know i said i was gonna try and post more often but i really havent been able to because i got a job and its full time and i just ever have any time to blog. but now its like almost 5 am and i am at my friends house using her computer so i thought id blog because i need some serious advice and just need to vent.<br /><br /><br />ok so i need advice first. so my friend S has this friend C who is really cute and ive met him a few times before and we kinda hit it off a little bit but last time i saw him was when he had boyfriend. so one night i was out clubbing and it was really lame so we ended up leaving early and right when i was leaving S calls me saying shes at C's house and he wants to hook up with me. so at this point it had been 3 months since i had sex so i was wanting it. so i went over there. so we were hanging out he was really really drunk and we were talking and he kept saying how he really liked me before and how when he broke up with his bf he was too nervous to text me because supossedly i was too cute for him lol. so i dont know if that was the alcohol making him say stupid stuff or if he was really feeling that way. so we ended up having sex and it was amazing!!! like absolutly amazing! and we just totally connected i felt anyways and then i really started to like him. so we kinda texted a bit after that and then i kept trying to hang out with him but when i was free he was busy and vice versa so it took us 3 weeks to finally see each other which was last weekend. and we got to have sex again and it was still really good. but so now the thing im worried about is....he hasnt really been texting me since then. see the first time we hooked up he blacked out and didnt really remember anything but the second time he remembered everything soooo im worried that now that he remembers he doesnt like me anymore because idk maybe i wasnt that good or idk...lol <br /><br />but!!! there is a chance i might get to see him tomorrow night after work...well tonight....and so hopefully i can put all my paranoid fears behind me. but well see. i want to know what you guys think? i really like him and would love to end up maybe having a relationship with him. so i wanna know if he feels the same way about me as i do about him. <br /><br />so what do you guys think about him not texting me after? for two days i didnt hear anything from him. i even texted him first and no reply.... so i just wanna know what you guys may think....Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-44119600475285658522010-03-25T00:04:00.000-07:002010-03-25T00:05:27.117-07:00It finally happened.So as you know from yesterday I have a lot of stories to tell you guys from the past few months so here's my biggest news that I couldn't wait to share! <br /><br /><br />So if you've been reading my blog and you pretty much know a lot about my life and everything. <br /><br />Well a new page has been turned. I finally had sex lol. It happened in January but since I didn't have a way to blog I couldn't tell my story right away lol. So here's the story<br /><br />So you all know my best friend K. Well she broke up with her boyfriend (the one I made out with lol) and then to get back at him she slept with his cousin. Lol....<br /><br />Well we were all at my friend S birthday party in a hotel room and K wanted to bring that guy over cause she needed a little reliever lol. Well it didn't really work out that way lol. <br /><br />He found out I was there and that I was gay so he decided he wanted to add me into the equation. Lol so instead of a threesome it turned into a twosome with me and him lol. <br /><br />So here's how it all played out.....we were hanging out drinking and then we started winding down and getting ready for "bed" and it was in a hotel room and me and S were in one bed and K and that guy were in the other bed. It was just a little room. So we ended up all texting each other and he wanted me to get in bed with them but I was sooo nervous and I was scared it was gonna be really really awkward with K being right there. So I finally got the nerve to go over there and were laying there talking and then I feel a hand start unbuttoning my pants. It was him, K in the middle and then me. He was reaching over K to get to me and I started returning the favor and reaching over K to get to him. Lol and so she was just awkwardly in the middle lol so he basically just told her to get out of the way so she got out of the bed and then we just started making out. <br /><br />And I was so lost I didn't know what to do or anything. And the guy wasn't very talkative so I just did what I kinda thought I was supposed to do haha. I just went down and started blowing him and then he grabbed me and made me turn around and so we got to 69 for a while and it was awesome! And so after like 15-20 min of that I got on top of him and he was gonna stick it in me but we had no lube so after a few min of trying to do it like that I finally told him to give it to me from behind lol that did the trick lol. It felt really good! I was scared cause I didn't want it to hurt but it didn't it felt really good lol. <br /><br />And so after he finished he totally just turned around and fell asleep =/ <br /><br />But its not over yet lol I wasn't fully satisfied cause I didn't even get off! So I was gonna get off no matter what lol. So after a few hours of him sleeping I decided to wake him up by touching him and then he started to get hard while he was sleeping so I just kept stroking it. And he woke up and started stroking mine and then I grabbed his head and made him go down on me and then I got a nice satisfying blow job lol and he swallowed and went back to sleep after I stroked him to completion and then I finally got to go to sleep lol. <br /><br />So that's my huge news! Lol I'm no longer a virgin! I had sex with him once after that and then he started like getting obsessed and I just stopped talking to him cause he was really weird. Lol <br /><br />So now I'm in search of more boys to sleep with ;) lolSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-9168802029267833112010-03-23T18:56:00.000-07:002010-03-23T18:57:41.965-07:00Bloggers!!!! I missed you soo much!!!! So let me explain myself.....last time I blogged I was in the middle of moving....and so we moved and got kinda settled in....and....we had to move again! So I was busy doing that!! And then I didn't have my awesome internet phone and I don't have a computer so I couldn't blog when I actually had the time!!! So its been a few months since I last blogged I'm very sorry! And its crazy because these past few months sooooo much stuff has happened that I've been dying to share with all of you! <br /><br />So in the next few days I will be filling you in month by month letting you know what the heck I've been up to! I can just make one giant post but I don't know if that's such a good idea lol.......so today will be this post telling you I'm back for as long as possible and that by Friday we will be all caught up on my life. <br /><br />So this will be the only post for today only because! I have an awesome night planned. I get to go to a club opening! Vip access! And everyone in my group gets a complimentary bottle of grey goose to themselves! Sooo I'm about to get tore up from the floor up tonight! Wish me luck hopefully I get to meet someone tonight! =) <br /><br />Oh and don't worry I will not abandon you all again. At least not without telling you everything that's been happening! So stay tuned your gonna wanna hear my stories! <br /><br />Oh and I noticed I have more followers! Welcome! I hope you enjoy my stories!Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-89458060720596103802009-12-21T03:22:00.000-08:002009-12-21T03:39:24.351-08:00still a kinda virgin...lolomg so ok....my night tonight. was absolutly wild and crazy!!!! <br /><br />so what im about to share with you guys is totally crazy and i mean if i cant share it with anyone else other than my blog followers who else can i share it with lol.<br /><br />so first of lets say what happened in the beginning. i came over to K's house which was totally awesome because i want to see her and everything and i missed her. and i knew i wanted to get absolutly sooooo drunk!!!!! so i brought a bottle of vodka and she bought me a 40 of old englush (ghetto right hahha) well i drank half the bottle of vodka and half of the old english and i was smashed!!!! i mean smashed!!!!! i could walk, focus, stand, see, nothing lol. so after a while i starting feeling sick so i kinda threw up lol. and then i was fine and then we were chillin it was me, K, her boyfriend and another friend who we can call S. well me and s have known each other for a while now and everything and it was suuper fun hanging out with her. and before i threw up we were making out. lol i made out with S, with K's boyfriend (dont worry shes fine with it lol) and K!! it was sooo fun! usually i get kinda grossed out with the whole tongue in my mouth thing but it didnt bother me i guess because i was in the moment and everything was awesome lol. but anyways thats not the interesting part lol <br /><br />so me and S were just chillin on the bed we made out a little more (after i brushed my teethe though haha) and we were talking about how im a virgin and how i need to lose that lol. so we all decided my virginity was gonna be gone by the end of the night lol. so we were making out and then we all decided we needed condoms so we were gonna go to the store and then i threw up again lol. so after i was done with that and me and K were talking and saying how we were both ok with what was gonna happen and everything i brushed my teeth again and then me and S went into the room and she was taking my clothes off because we pretty much decided we were having sex tonight lol and she was feeling me up and everything and heres the part i can only share with my blog followers. it wasnt working!!! i wasnt working down there! idk what happened or what but down there was not working out for me so good. if you know what i mean. so after a while of feeling it up and then she sucked on it a little bit it got a little excited and then we put a condom on and then she got on top of me and then we tried and then.....guess what happened.....it died again lol. <br /><br />it was sooo lame! we were both naked i felt her up she was feeling me up everything was good and then she got on top and it just went....dead lol. <br /><br />now idk why it happened im guess probably because i was hammered lol. but idk....but she totally knows how i like boys and i am more attracted to boys than girls and so she understood so she set me up with this gay bpy she knows who is really cute. im sure it wouldnt turn into something more than just a fling but i know i would want my first time to be with someone hot lol. and believe me he is lol. we were texting a little bit and everything and hes really nice. and seems like a good boyfriend but he told me hes not really looking for a boyfriend so thats totally fine with me. <br /><br />but the sad thing is i couldnt do it! i totally had my chance to have sex and it totally wasnt happening. which is ok S is my friend and idk what it would have down if we actually did do it but i guess we will never know lol <br /><br />but i am starting to ramble and kinda fall asleep typing so i will post tomorrow and see if i remeber everything anyways lol.Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-49099534340389090742009-12-15T00:06:00.000-08:002009-12-15T00:08:03.114-08:00tomorrow nightHey guys. So tomorrow night is the night everyones going out clubbing and I am hoping soooo bad to go. The only thing keeping me from going is how poor I am! Lol I absolutly have no money lol. I want to go sooo bad. Not only do I love going out but there's a chance one of my friends wants to bring a guy for me to meet =). Hopefully everything works out! <br /><br />I've been stuck in the house all weekend and I am ready to party!!! Lol its been way to long since the last time I partied...mainly because of the move and stuff. But I'm just crossing my fingers to go! <br /><br />So let's see what else is going on in my life....absolutly nothing lol. Its hard to blog when nothing exciting is going on lol. <br /><br />You know what I need....a sugar daddy! Ha! imagine that lol. <br /><br />Well hope you guys had a good weekend and everything was awesome!Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-60865751817671048392009-12-15T00:03:00.000-08:002009-12-15T00:04:56.165-08:00Zac always makes me feel better =)<p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDKB407oI/AAAAAAAAAHY/n6Myn09KZao/s1600-h/zac-efron-vanessa-hudgens-hawaii-wedding-02-796166.jpg"><img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDKB407oI/AAAAAAAAAHY/n6Myn09KZao/s320/zac-efron-vanessa-hudgens-hawaii-wedding-02-796166.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5415370916520849026" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDKRbpbVI/AAAAAAAAAHg/nX6Qqu5wa_M/s1600-h/1247372082_b745b709c1-797699.jpg"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDKRbpbVI/AAAAAAAAAHg/nX6Qqu5wa_M/s320/1247372082_b745b709c1-797699.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5415370920693427538" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDK9bA_lI/AAAAAAAAAHo/NWT1pZo0E5M/s1600-h/a10_zac_044-22_logo__opt-799233.jpg"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDK9bA_lI/AAAAAAAAAHo/NWT1pZo0E5M/s320/a10_zac_044-22_logo__opt-799233.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5415370932501937746" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDLOCjgpI/AAAAAAAAAHw/CKRqohhkl0Q/s1600-h/zac5-700538.jpg"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDLOCjgpI/AAAAAAAAAHw/CKRqohhkl0Q/s320/zac5-700538.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5415370936962744978" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDLXz91eI/AAAAAAAAAH4/uEIStahNido/s1600-h/zac-efron-vanessa-hudgens-watchmen-1-701108.jpg"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDLXz91eI/AAAAAAAAAH4/uEIStahNido/s320/zac-efron-vanessa-hudgens-watchmen-1-701108.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5415370939585910242" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDLTFa9VI/AAAAAAAAAIA/4q7ragEngmk/s1600-h/tumblr_krezftTCtB1qz7srjo1_1280-701724.jpg"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/SydDLTFa9VI/AAAAAAAAAIA/4q7ragEngmk/s320/tumblr_krezftTCtB1qz7srjo1_1280-701724.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5415370938316944722" /></a></p>here's some pictures of zac to cheer everyone up =) he is so cute! I just can't get enough of him. I have to admit though he wasn't that great looking when he was younger but when he got older he turned into a gorgeous piece of man! <p>Oh and ps the picture of him with that little boy its so cute! Idk if that's his relative or just some little kid but it looks like he is soo nice and caring. <p>I can't wait to go to the beach one day and see him there all wet and half naked. Lol I would defintely take as many pictures that my camera would hold! Lol I can dream lolSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-4136669896494591502009-12-13T00:30:00.001-08:002009-12-13T00:30:44.539-08:00tonight!Hey guys. So tonight was fun. I went out to dinner with some friends and it so fun because now our new house I am closer to everyone so I have more freedom to leave when I want. Lol <br /><br />So dinner was fun just a few friends having some girl talk time lol. And in a few days we are supposed to go clubbing and guess what?! One of my friends has a friend, a single friend she wants to hook me up with =). I think that would be awesome! I don't know much about him yet but I know he's going out with us when we go to the club. I'm excited! Now I definetly have to go. Lol. <br />So that's pretty much all that's been happening in my life lol. <br /><br />Oh idk if you guys remember from a while ago but A who was expecting a baby isn't expecting anymore, they had the baby a few days ago. I guess it came out looking like him because I haven't heard anything about it lol. (There was some speculation lol) but I'm happy for him. I have been thinking about him a lot though lately. I know its silly to think about someone who's absolutly 100% unavailable but its a little hard to get over him lol. A few weeks ago I went out of town for thanksgiving and I was so close to him! Like so close! It was sooo frustrating I wasn't able to see him. Lol but that's enough about that lol <br /><br />I'm thinking of starting a video blog also. I have some kinks to work out but I'm hoping it will be able to happen. So stay tuned. I think id be able to be more in contact with people that way. I would still blog here too so don't worry about that. I'm serious about trying to make this blog better than it was before. <br /><br />Oh and one last thing. I'm trying to figure out why its so difficult to post comments on peoples blogs using my phones web browser so don't feel left out if you don't get comments from me. I am reading your blogs though. It works on some blogs but not everyones. Lol. <br /><br />Well ill talk to you all later =)Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-55339114262722170152009-12-10T19:29:00.001-08:002009-12-10T19:29:48.255-08:00here i am!Hey guys. I know I haven't blogged in forever but now I actually have a good reason lol. I was moving into a new house which took foooorever!!! And have just been suuper busy with a lot of other things and just haven't had the time. <br /><br />I missed blogging so much because there is always something on my mind and I know I can always express it with you all here so I hope I can be more on the ball about it. <br /><br />My blog has cobwebs and I'm here to dust them off. Hopefully I will stick to it lol. I will get this blog up and running better than before and it will be a lot easier now because ill actually have more life experiences to talk about because I am closer to everyone since I moved so look forward to that =) <br /><br />And also if there are any new bloggers that have started blogging since I've been gone fill me in. In the meantime I'm gonna read some of your blogs and see what's going on in everyone elses lives =)Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-50032886267041060432009-11-20T01:45:00.001-08:002009-11-20T01:45:55.519-08:00some new infoHey guys what's up with everyone? <br /><br />So lately my life has been sooo lame! All I do is stay home and text and not even anyone important lol that guy I was texting we don't text anymore for some reason lol....oh well lol. I did like him cause he told me cute I was all the time lol. <br /><br />I've been thinking about A a lot lately...it would be weird for me to just text him out of the blue...and plus his baby mama has his phone all the time anyways so its no use. I miss him though he was freaking fine as hell! <br /><br />Me and J done really talk anymore idk why I'm sure if I texted her she would text me back but I don't necissarily have the desire to text her so idk...maybe this weekend. I'm gonna be with K pretty much all this weekend so that will be fun. <br /><br />I've also decided I'm gonna be devirginized by the end of this year. Its not the act of sex I want to experience its just the act of being with someone in that way, having that connection with someone to sleep with them. You know ever since I've started hanging out with everyone since I moved I haven't met one virgin! Its like by this age they don't exist. And I don't mind being a virgin in a group of not virgins but when its all everyone talks about it makes it a little hard. <br /><br />Does anybody by the age of 19 know any virgins? Lol ya I doubt it lol <br /><br />But I'm serious about the talk always being about sex. And I mean aaaaalllways! And I just sit there quiet...and when people find out I'm a virgin they are completely shocked! Its ridiculous. Noones ever even seen down there except my doctor lol. And that hasn't happened in a long time either lol. I might have sent a dirty picture maybe but I don't exactly remember lol. I've seen a lot of dicks but noones ever seen mine lol. <br /><br />So what do you all think of my little situation? <br /><br />Thanks guysSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-17264238121228745542009-11-16T10:49:00.000-08:002009-11-16T10:54:59.744-08:00.......cant think of a titleHey guys. I feel sooo bad for not blogging in what feels like a month! But I have actually been busy lol. I have been at K's a lot lately and my phone is always dead there! Lol. But I'm at home now and felt like blogging. So here's what been going on lately.<br /><br /><br />So me and that guy who I've been texting haven't texted in a few days but my phone has been dead so I guess idk. Lol I was at a party like last week and met this awesome guy. And he was gay so it made it even better. Hopefully it isn't the last time I see him. <br /><br />Oh and all my friends know I'm gay too which is not a bad thing. I didn't tell anyone people just assumed and I stopped correcting them I figured why waste my energy and just live it! Lol. I'm happy about it though no worries. <br /><br />I have a new best friend!!! She's not a replacement from K she's still a best friend but I have another one! She's sooo awesome and we get along great. We are already really comfortable with each other its so much fun! We can call her "R". Ill be talking about her a lot so. <br /><br />What else.....I'm moving out of my house soon and I will be waaay closer to everyone and be able to meet more people and have a good time which is amazing! <br /><br />I haven't had a chance to read peoples blogs so I'm gonna catch up on my blog reading tonight. <br /><br />So I've totally missed everyone and my blog has cobwebs on it which makes me sad. So I'm gonna try really hard to blog more often. But we will see. <br /><br />There is something I wanted to talk about though. My week at K's house was fun but all everyone ever talks about is sex! Sex sex sex sex nothing else! I'm usually a quiet person anyways but when the conversation comes to sex (which it always does!) I'm just a little person in the corner not doing anything. Because I have nothing to talk about when it comes to sex because I have never had sex so you know its just a little awkward. And all the couples! Omg its soo weird when your with a group of people who are all couples and your the only one who's alone. Soo many times this past week I was the 3rd wheel or the 5th wheel its just sucks! Especially when my phone is dead and I can't use it to pretend I'm doing something haha. <br /><br />So I will try and blog more I know I used to blog like every night and then I just stopped idk why exactly I just got busy or tired idk. I do really miss blogging though lol and hopefully when I move and am closer to everyone ill have more interesting stuff to talk about lol <br /><br />Well thanks guys for reading =)Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-80200052206417207492009-11-05T16:38:00.000-08:002009-11-05T16:39:07.545-08:00sooo sorry!!Hey everyone. I'm sooo sorry I've been kinda non cosistant with my blogging and I'm not gonna lie I really haven't been busy just lazy I guess lol. <br /><br />So my last post. I was saying how I met this guy and we've been texting and we haven't really been texting as much as we started to but that's ok. We talk about everything even people we are interested in like J and he has this girl or whatever idk lol but anyways its been fun. <br /><br />Oh and thanks for the advice to be careful don't worry I would never meet someone in person that I met online alone. I would take K or someone or have her be in the background somewhere lol. Just to be safe lol. <br /><br />So me and K are in a weird place we haven't been in the same place we usually are. Its kinda having me worried but whatever happens happens. Right now at this point I think we could use a break from each other for a while because I think we both are a little frustrated with each other. <br /><br />Halloween was this weekend. Mine suucked! Big time! I was totally alone and by myself. In a way I guess it wasn't bad but it did kinda suck. It seems when we are single and alone holidays are just a huge reminder that we are alone lol. Don't get me wrong I looove holidays, Halloween especially but I noticed this year that being alone on a fun day like halloween sucks! Big time! I had noone to share the fun with. But J did ask if I wanted to party with her but I had no way of getting to her so it kinda sucked. She sent me a pic of her costume though =) it was really cute! Its taking sooo much of me to not text her every 5 minutes but I don't want her to think I'm bugging her so thats a problem. I can be very desperate sometimes. <br /><br />Like with K I'm trying to take a stand and let her know things are not ok with us so I'm not texting her or anything until she contacts me first so I'm just waiting right now lol. But I am trying so hard not to be desperate and text her because I do want to talk to her and make up but I want to make a point that something is not right. So we will see how that works lol <br /><br />So as you may know I am unenployed and so I venture over to the unemployment office and while I was searching through the jobs there was one where I had to talk to a counsler and see how they can help me get the job. Well it turned out the person who helped me was really really cool. He was gay and he automatically could tell the same for me so we talked a little and he was really cool. So helpful too I'm really glad he called my name instead of any of the other people there, I'm sure they are nice too but I'm glad I got him. He was telling me about this place where young gay kids hang out and stuff and I was really happy to find out and maybe I could go and venture out to meeting people. <br /><br />so now that I am back I will read some blogs. I'm having some problems commenting so don't feel bad if I never comment your guys post. My phone sometimes doesn't work lol. But I'm reading them =)Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-60900836788372584322009-10-29T14:23:00.001-07:002009-10-29T14:23:52.078-07:00OMG!Hey everyone I am so sorry I've been kinda gone lol I've just been a little crazy. So in my last post I said I had a halloween party and so it happened and it failed we ended up leaving and going somewhere else. It sucks cause I put so much work into it but whatevs it was alright. <br /><br />But that's not what I want to talk about. So I've been saying how I want someone to talk to and text and maybe end up dating or something. Weeeelll I have news! I kinda might have met someone =). <br /><br />So I was trying something new and did something kinda lame. I posted an ad on craigslist.org and to my surprise some people replied and there was this old guy who was kinda scary and child molesting looking and he was kinda old and not very hot. But there was this other guy who replied. Someone who's the same age as me and we just started emailing and we found out we have sooo much in common. So by this time I knew I wanted to keep talking to him. So we exchanged numbers and started texting!!! Omg right! We ended up texting all night! Like we were up until like 430 in the morning texting! How crazy is that! We have sooo much in common like almost everything we are practicaly the same person. And one of the first things we did was exchange pictures. Just our faces no dirty ones lol. The thing is I kinda told myself I wanted to like the guy before I saw pics so I would make sure I wouldn't see him and say eww and blow them off. But I figured it should be ok. So he sent me a pic and he wasn't bad looking maybe a new haircut but not bad. No zac efron mind you but you know. But we still ended up texting for hours! Then he texted me again today and were texting for hours too!!! how awesome is this!<br /><br />He also said to me that if I ever wanted to meet and get together it would be on him...awwww! I think I might be seeing an actual date in my future! Since we kinda were thinking about next week. And the cool thing is we are both unemployed so I won't feel like I'm a scrub and he won't feel like a sugar daddy lol. This is soo exciting! <br /><br />You know what he also said...he said I am the hottest guy he has ever seen! Isn't that soo nice! He's a virgin (like me) he likes boys and girls (like me), he's in the closet (like me) we are soo much alike! <br /><br />What do you guys think? You guys are who I tell everything to, I share so much in this blog and I love that! So what do you guys think? Meet a guy online and meet up with him? This is so exciting! <br /><br />But also in my mind is on J. I am constantly thinking about her! But she hasn't texted me back in a while...I wonder why that is...idk it has me a little worried why she hasn't texted me. But I am always thinking about her and how much I like her soooo much! so getting involved with this guy when I'm thinking about J would be kinda bad. I wonder if I would be good at this lol. Dating is a little nerve racking I've never been on a date really. ...... how lame is my life if I'm 19 never been on a date....lol <br /><br />So there's a lot other stuff id want to talk about but I will save it until tomorrow I want to hear what you guys think about this. =) <br /><br />Thanks guysSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-21161282000812670282009-10-22T02:38:00.000-07:002009-10-22T02:40:35.745-07:00hmm....no title drawing a blank :Dhaven't posted in a few days or gotten the chance to read peoples blogs so fogive me. Lol I've been really busy planning a halloween party I am having this weekend!!! I'm sooo suuper excited for it. Its the first halloween party I've had in my new 5 story house so I'm excited! <br /><br />Aaaannd something else that's exciting is J is coming!!!!! And sleeping over!!! I mean I'm not expecting anything but I have a lot of situations that could happen and they are all playing in my head like a movie soo I'm really excited to see if anything happens!!!! <br /><br />So as you may know there has been some drama surrounding J you know with K hating her and me liking her so its gonna be interesting to see them both at my party this weekend =/ I'm not too worried about it. I mean I feel like I shouldn't have to choose between the two....oh well it will be ok. Lol <br /><br />So part of me wants something to happen between me and J and another part of me doesn't want to because I feel if we do hook up that's all its gonna be....I want a relationship and I want to be able to call someone my boyfriend or girlfriend and then sleep with them....but I think I'm 19 and I feel like its time for me to break out of my shell and finally do that big thing called sex! Lol but I'm not gonna just give it up because I want to like I want a relationship not just a one night stand...especially for my first time....I guess ill just have to wait and see exactly what happens lol <br /><br />You know what else I was thinking. I'm here its 2:30 am and I wish I had someone to text...I mean I wish I had someone to text anytime of the day but I'm just sitting here alone bored out of my mind! And noones awake! Lol but that is something I've always wanted is someone to text during the day who makes me smile and just someone I know ill probably never meet face to face but just to text and send crazy pics to each other and just be cool! That would be soo awesome! <br /><br /><br /><br />Here are some questions for readers to answer just to get to know people better. I always like to know people better and love meeting people. <br /><br />Does anyone have a texting buddy? How was everyone elses first times? Or is there any other virgins like me =) would be awesome to hear some first time stories or anything really lol you can email me or leave a comment either way =) <br /><br />If your reading this just know I think your awesome! ;)Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-54602105364752954422009-10-18T12:56:00.000-07:002009-10-18T14:09:35.598-07:00Happy Birthday Gorgeous!<p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuED2fKotI/AAAAAAAAAFA/AINY9_eyaoo/s1600-h/zac-efron-pic-interview-inc-2009-mikael-jansson-210538450-775599.jpg"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuED2fKotI/AAAAAAAAAFA/AINY9_eyaoo/s320/zac-efron-pic-interview-inc-2009-mikael-jansson-210538450-775599.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050180407010002" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEEfDMT8I/AAAAAAAAAFI/7SNdbWue_6k/s1600-h/zac-efron-02_5-777072.jpg"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEEfDMT8I/AAAAAAAAAFI/7SNdbWue_6k/s320/zac-efron-02_5-777072.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050191295532994" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEEu-2Q4I/AAAAAAAAAFQ/i8Jx7NwCC7c/s1600-h/004dw315-778757.jpeg"><img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEEu-2Q4I/AAAAAAAAAFQ/i8Jx7NwCC7c/s320/004dw315-778757.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050195572278146" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEFOyjG9I/AAAAAAAAAFY/3unTCj05aMo/s1600-h/zac-efron-beach-780511.jpg"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEFOyjG9I/AAAAAAAAAFY/3unTCj05aMo/s320/zac-efron-beach-780511.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050204110625746" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEFWJ0QDI/AAAAAAAAAFg/d8JQ_2NvZGE/s1600-h/zac-efron-17again-781920.jpg"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEFWJ0QDI/AAAAAAAAAFg/d8JQ_2NvZGE/s320/zac-efron-17again-781920.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050206087266354" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEFwwGo8I/AAAAAAAAAFo/K-CQ9gmzs54/s1600-h/zac-efron-high-school-musical-2915287-306-458-783769.jpg"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEFwwGo8I/AAAAAAAAAFo/K-CQ9gmzs54/s320/zac-efron-high-school-musical-2915287-306-458-783769.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050213227176898" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEGcFMlsI/AAAAAAAAAFw/g00sOl4TUvY/s1600-h/photo-of-zac-efron-785595.jpg"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEGcFMlsI/AAAAAAAAAFw/g00sOl4TUvY/s320/photo-of-zac-efron-785595.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050224858371778" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEG21diUI/AAAAAAAAAF4/BVlUbHuy6mc/s1600-h/zac_efron_low_rise_jeans_01a-787271.jpg"><img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEG21diUI/AAAAAAAAAF4/BVlUbHuy6mc/s320/zac_efron_low_rise_jeans_01a-787271.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050232040130882" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEHLxEX1I/AAAAAAAAAGA/OJJyH8YZDLE/s1600-h/handsome-in-a-tanktop-788758.jpg"><img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEHLxEX1I/AAAAAAAAAGA/OJJyH8YZDLE/s320/handsome-in-a-tanktop-788758.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050237658849106" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEHhXn8HI/AAAAAAAAAGI/ElPNw9Nh98I/s1600-h/zac-efron-slarge-4b-790293.jpg"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEHhXn8HI/AAAAAAAAAGI/ElPNw9Nh98I/s320/zac-efron-slarge-4b-790293.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050243457708146" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEH_kB17I/AAAAAAAAAGQ/xfRnlbaCpdo/s1600-h/6a00e54fb7301c88340120a56fae4e970c-800wi-791607.jpeg"><img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEH_kB17I/AAAAAAAAAGQ/xfRnlbaCpdo/s320/6a00e54fb7301c88340120a56fae4e970c-800wi-791607.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050251562801074" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEIal8RdI/AAAAAAAAAGY/JaC7As2E0L0/s1600-h/zacefrontrailcq3-793260.jpg"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEIal8RdI/AAAAAAAAAGY/JaC7As2E0L0/s320/zacefrontrailcq3-793260.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050258818581970" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEIpdUITI/AAAAAAAAAGg/-IzjuNObr28/s1600-h/001d6web-794903.jpeg"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEIpdUITI/AAAAAAAAAGg/-IzjuNObr28/s320/001d6web-794903.jpeg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050262808928562" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEJMVeHGI/AAAAAAAAAGo/5P1U5xkzGPg/s1600-h/img_180-796585.jpg"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEJMVeHGI/AAAAAAAAAGo/5P1U5xkzGPg/s320/img_180-796585.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050272171269218" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEJsDcGWI/AAAAAAAAAGw/Xpwggj5CNxE/s1600-h/details-zac-efron-798358.png"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEJsDcGWI/AAAAAAAAAGw/Xpwggj5CNxE/s320/details-zac-efron-798358.png" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050280685574498" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEKPSY97I/AAAAAAAAAG4/i3sIdcXb02w/s1600-h/classic-zac-700591.jpg"><img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEKPSY97I/AAAAAAAAAG4/i3sIdcXb02w/s320/classic-zac-700591.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050290143524786" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEKkaRqHI/AAAAAAAAAHA/AoDZTxSdWk4/s1600-h/ad_zac_efron1a-702913.jpg"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuEKkaRqHI/AAAAAAAAAHA/AoDZTxSdWk4/s320/ad_zac_efron1a-702913.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050295813744754" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuELHFOr3I/AAAAAAAAAHI/ywNJdO6kHgE/s1600-h/in-gq-704975.jpg"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuELHFOr3I/AAAAAAAAAHI/ywNJdO6kHgE/s320/in-gq-704975.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050305120710514" /></a></p><p class="mobile-photo"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuELrLVelI/AAAAAAAAAHQ/S70Ozz_cwB0/s1600-h/zac-706806.jpg"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_dH8q2lARRjo/StuELrLVelI/AAAAAAAAAHQ/S70Ozz_cwB0/s320/zac-706806.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5394050314809997906" /></a></p>So today is Zac Efrons birthday!!!!! Happy birthday Zac. <p>He is 22 today and I would have posted 22 pictures but I think this is enough =) <p>The things I would do to go to his birthday party! (The things I would do to him at his birthday party lol)<p>Its also been a while since I posted pictures...so here's a lot I know I've posted most of them before but oh well lol he is still hot either way. <p>HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZAC!Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-44861737590130198782009-10-17T00:11:00.000-07:002009-10-17T00:12:45.876-07:00Im not in high school anymore stop acting like it! oh ya i came out lolSo todays post was tooootally gonna be focused on how I shaved my legs for the first time since I was on the swim team months and months and months ago. But I actually have some drama to share today lol. <br /><br />So as you all know I really really really like J. And my best friend K hates her...with a passion. She was the one who introduced me to her in the first place and we all used to be friends until j screwed k over in some way I'm not to clear about anyways. So we were talking today, oh I came out to her today but I will explain that later. So we were just talking about people I like and she was very persistant in knowing and I just knew she was gonna get mad cause she always gets mad when I talk about J. But I told her anyways I mean she already knows I like her but I guess she hates hearing it eventhough she always brings her up. So anyways I told her J is who I liked and she got a little mad and she said she's only a little mad and she would get over it and she was done talking to me. So then I got a little mad because she never likes to talk about her problems and I am the one who does like to talk about my problems. So I kept telling her how I felt and it just got sooo stupid! She actually gave me permission to go for jessica and if something did happen she wouldn't get mad.....whatever that's a lie! But its soo frustrating but I have decided I am gonna go for J I want a special someone and it very well could be J. So I'm gonna do it! <br /><br />So anyways I came out to K today. she asked me if I was gay and I asked her what made her think that way and she told me its just the way you are. I didn't know where to be offended or what to think. So I asked it that was a bad thing and she said no shed love me no matter what and I just got tired of playing around and I just told her exactly what I told all of you. Exactly the same thing. She didn't seem to mind. It might be a little weird to be around her now that I have told her. But I don't even want to think about seeing her cause I'm sooo frustrated with her! Lol so idk what's gonna happen. <br /><br />I guess it sucked that right after I told her I liked boys as well we talked about J and she got all pissed off. <br /><br />But besides you all I haven't came out to anyone so know that I have I'm kinda glad I did. <br /><br />So anyways I just had to get this stupid high school drama off my chest! Its soo ridiculous! Lol <br /><br />But I did come out today to one person. <br /><br />And I shaved my legs...let's talk about that lol <br /><br />I actually cheated and used veet...I like nair better but had veet so I used it lol. I love how smooth my legs are and think I'm gonna have to keep this up lol I just hate shaving them its such a hassle and annoying lolSuperstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-21989076703094865832009-10-16T22:47:00.000-07:002009-10-16T22:50:00.793-07:00hahaha some cool surveyOk so these survey things used to be huuuuge on myspace and I would sit there and do survey after survey after survey and then I got tired of it but that was a long time ago and then I saw this survey on Bens Blog and thought it was pretty cool so decided to fill it out =) <br /><br /><br />By the way thanks! <br /><br /><br />1. First thing you wash in the shower? My arms idk why it just happens lol<br /><br />2. What color is your favorite hoodie? Its a bright blue its awesome! <br /><br />3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? YES! And probably will kiss them again this weekend! It was J lol <br /><br />4. Do you plan outfits every day? I'm a fashion major....of course! Lol <br /><br />5. How are you feeling RIGHT now? UGH like I have to much drama in my life. <br /><br />6. What’s the closest thing to you that's red? Lol a hot dog on a stick toy hat that I pinned on my wall haha it has some red in it. <br /><br />7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having? I was with some friends and A was there and some other hot guy and everyone was naked lol it was a pretty hot dream lol <br /><br />8. Did you meet anybody new today? Nope <br /><br />9. What are you craving right now? A big tommy burger! <br /><br />10. Do you floss? Of Course! I take very good care of my teeth. <br /><br />11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage? Um.....cabbage....lol <br /><br />12. Are you emotional? I guess you could say I am sometimes. <br /><br />13. Have you ever counted to 1,000? In english and in spanish =) <br /><br />14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it? Definetly lick it! I don't think I've met someone who bites it lol<br /><br />15. Do you like your hair? Lol ya its pretty crazy lol I get looks when I'm out in public hahaha<br /><br />16. Do you like yourself? Of course I love myself.<br /><br />17. Would you go out to eat with George Bush? I guess maybe I can ask him a bunch of gay questions lol <br /><br />18. What are you listening to right now? Heidi Montag lol I love heidis music haha<br /><br />19. Are your parents strict? Ha! No way! Lol one is kinda annoying though haha<br /><br />20. Would you go sky diving? Yes very soon actually I just gotta take this class or seminar or something lol <br /><br />21. Do you like cottage cheese? Eww!!!! No! <br /><br />22. Have you ever met a celebrity? Um...LA is filled with them. I've partied with celebrities. <br /><br />23. Do you rent movies often? Ya sometimes....depends on if I have the money lol <br /><br />24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in? Yep! The shirt I wore for the fashion show I was in! <br /><br />25. How many countries have you visited? Canada..... that's it.....australia soon hopefully! <br /><br />26. Have you made a prank phone call? Hehehehe yep! Loooove them! <br /><br />27. Ever been on a train? Of course! Trains are awesome choo choo! Lol<br /><br />28. Brown or white eggs? Brown eggs...they seem more organic lol <br /><br />29. Do you have a cell-phone? Of course that's how I have a social life haha<br /><br />30. Do you use chap stick? I go through a tube of carmex every 2 weeks.....id say ya lol <br /><br />31. Do you own a gun? Hahahaha I can think of plenty of ways this question can be dirty =) hahaha <br /><br />32. Can you use chop sticks? Yes. I like using chopsticks more than forks cause it makes me look smarter lol. And plus I eat a lot of sushi <br /><br />33. Who are you going to be with tonight? Me, myself, and I......sadly<br /><br />34. Are you too forgiving? UGH unfortunetly! I don't know how to hold a grudge cause I end up missing the person too much lol <br /><br />35. Ever been in love? Not in love love I guess...I'm in love with a lot of people but not that way haha<br /><br />36. What is your best friend(s) doing tomorrow? School I guess idk we are in a weird place right now.....sounds crazy right? <br /><br />37. Ever have cream puffs? Cream puffs? Hahaha <br /><br />38. Last time you cried? Awwww when I watched the color purple the day I was super sick! That movie is something else! I cried like 10 times! <br /><br />39. What was the last question you asked? What's your problem?!<br /><br />40. Favorite time of the year? My birthday lol <br /><br />41. Do you have any tattoos? Not yet ;) <br /><br />42. Are you sarcastic? Sometimes. I guess.. lol <br /><br />43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect? I loove that movie and ashton kutcher is hot! Lol <br /><br />44.Ever walked into a wall? Hahaha ya those crazy drunken nights hahaha<br /><br />45. Favorite color? Pink, Green, and leopard print! I know that's not a color but whatevs! I love it! <br /><br />46. Have you ever slapped someone? Not in the face ;) hehehe<br /><br />47. Is your hair curly? Nope! Straight as a bored. <br /><br />48. What was the last CD you bought? The cranberries 20th century masters collection =) <br /><br />49. Do looks matter? Of course they always do! Lol<br /><br />50. Could you ever forgive a cheater? Knowing me ya probably. <br /><br />51. Is your phone bill sky high? OMG yes! And I have noo way to pay it! <br /><br />52. Do you like your life right now? Of course I do I always love my life. <br /><br />53. Do you sleep with the TV on? Ya but it always goes to that screensaver thing for the dvd player cause I always watch a movie when I'm going to bed. <br /><br />54. Can you handle the truth? Yes! I hate when people can't tell me something because they think I won't be able to handle it lol <br /><br />55. Do you have good vision? Perfect vision! The eye doctor even said so! <br /><br />56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people? Lol I hate a lot of people and a lot of people hate me but that's old high school drama lol <br /><br />57. How often do you talk on the phone? Allll the time! Like aaaallll the time! <br /><br />58. The last person you held hands with? J =) and hopefully this weekend too =) <br /><br />59. What are you wearing? A short I got at disneyland, and some track pants, I'm getting ready to go for a jog =) <br /><br />60.What is your favorite animal? My Cute doggy! <br /><br />61. Where was your default picture taken at? Bathroom.....<br /><br />62. Can you hula hoop? I looove to hula hoop!!!! I used to be sooo good I could hula hoop around my waist, neck, arm and wrist! 63. Do you have a job? Nope....I'm a bum lol <br /><br />64. What was the most recent thing you bought? Um....cigarettes lol I know bad habit lol <br /><br />65. Have you ever crawled through a window? Hahahaha ya!Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7576877079580722734.post-80049911578418844372009-10-16T00:20:00.000-07:002009-10-16T01:23:21.559-07:00LOL! A Little ExperimentOk so I'm laying in bed and I have the worst headache in the entire world! So I'm texting K and she tells me the funniest thing I have heard in a long time. <br /><br />Orgasms relieve headache symptoms. So she told me to go masurbate and let her know how it works. The first though that came into my head was how ridiculous that sounds! And I just laughed and laughed soo hard (making my headache worse) and then I thought that its kinda weird to talk to her about that kind of stuff (we don't talk about my sexual anything lol) but anyways I decided to google it and I read some articles and its suppossed to work! <br /><br />Has anyone else head of this? Suppossedly it releases endorphins and it also redirects the blood flow from your head. I haven't tried it yet. But I will let you guys know! Its 12:25 right now and I'm saving it as a draft, gonna go do my thing and then tell you the result. Just a little experiment id thought id share with everyone =) <br /><br /><br />Saving as a draft 12:25 am <br /><br />Ok so it is now 1:20am and I tried my little experiment and I have the results<br /><br /><br />So my headache is still there a little bit but it almost went away. I know during the process it wasn't there but afterwards it was there a little not as bad as before but still there. And the more time that passes it just keeps coming back so all in all I would say it doesn't work....<br /><br />I have to admt it was a fun little experiment ;)Superstarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12162008156900868818noreply@blogger.com5